Ever notice how Christmas brings up ‘stuff’? And not all of it is last year’s decorations coming up from the basement.

Instead, there are expectations; either your own or someone’s expectation of you. Of course, that too, could be your own ‘stuff’ again.

But breathe past that stuff because Christmas also brings up some wonderful moments. For me, the best part about Christmas is the time we carve out for being with our friends.

Friends at Christmas – and any time of the year for that matter – are what makes life so rich and textured.

I had a wonderful time Friday night with my bike trip women friends. We have pulled off a nine-day bike trip every year for the last 22 years, which is in itself, pretty amazing.

But the most incredible thing is that we have such HUGE history. We have inside jokes, stories, context and know intimately each other’s weak spots, strengths, virtues and vices, and in spite of, or more correctly, because of, those things – we absolutely love each other.

It’s kind of ironic that we spend so much of our lives presenting our best face, our public shiny self, and yet we are truly loved when we are real and sweaty and not quite so presentable.

I am so grateful that my real friends have seen me depressed, anxious, and injured as well as joyful, excited, ten-feet tall and bulletproof…because, like them, I am all of those things…they not only allow for these various versions of me, but embrace them with grace.

Which brings me to the subject of new friends. I have been blessed to meet some amazing people and have connected with some great new women.

On Friday night, when the subject of friendship came up, one of my biker friends said she had decided she didn’t have enough time to see her oldest and dearest friends and didn’t want to dilute those opportunities by adding new or superficial relationships into her life.

Like any good friend’s comments, I found myself thinking about that quite a bit, and then wondering some more and finally have decided that she’s quite right.

It really is hard to find the time to get together with the tried-and-true, but for me, I also recognize that my life is so much richer by the encounters with the new people I meet and keep in contact with.

So, instead of deciding I have to pick door number one OR door number two. I’m drawing on my schizoid Gemini nature and am picking door number one AND door number two. I want it all.

I rationalize it this way…everyone is pretty darned busy with their lives. It’s quite hard to organize and get our old selves together but we do it because it’s a priority. But this still leaves big chunks of time where I can fit in new relationships. 

And because so many of these new friends are also twirling about in their own lives, when we do get together, we simply pick up like we’ve never been apart.

These are not little polite chats either…hell no, we get right into things. Each of them bring such different perspectives and views and pet subjects…

With one new friend, we dive deeply into religion and spirituality and deep veins of sustaining topics – with wild snorking laughter in-between.

Another new friend can be counted upon to somehow reveal me to be the master of one-liners. Who knew I was capable of witty repartee? I seriously have the most fun just sparring with her. Did I mention we also laugh until we can’t breathe?

I may not know as much of their day-to-day lives as I do with my more older friends, but I feel like we connect at some heart level that lets us skip right over that.

There are too many great women to list right now – both in the old and new friend category – but I treasure each one and the aspect of themselves that complements and brings out another aspect of me; a facet, that without their presence, I might never know existed in myself.

I see us all like those big old glittery disco balls…each friend lights up one part of our little mirror pieces and for those moments that we are in each other’s light…Oh my God, we shine and send shooting rays of light to totally different pieces of our worlds.

The time with that friend passes and we are in the presence of someone else and that too reveals our light and colour in a new way.

And then, when all the friends and their acompanying lights are gone, when the rink is closed and I’m just a big ol’ round disco ball sitting in the dark, I find myself still glowing and warm from all those wonderful moments.

And now, instead of mirroring big fiery rays, all the little sparks are deep inside me like firefly flickers. As I think of each face and each personality, I feel a complete body smile, a true deep gratitude for all they have revealed for me, to me, and often…in spite of me 🙂

I don’t need to bring up anything more decorations and stuff from the basement.

I’ve got my presents. I know that I’m the richest person in the world.

Merry Christmas to my old and new friends and to the friends I haven’t yet met. I love you all.