I was riding my city bike up Ontario Street this morning to meet my friend for her appointment at the cancer clinic.
It was sunny, but it felt like fake sunshine, a sun that held no real warmth. Instead there was a chill note of fall behind that facade of blue. Still, that false front of cloudless serenity could lull you into thinking that all is right with the world.
But clearly, if one is riding to a friend’s appointment at the cancer clinic, it is not alright at all.
It is SO not alright.
Cars ran red lights, pedestrians strode purposefully while muttering into blue-tooth headsets and zillions of other bicycles flew past me as I slowly laboured with my girlie bike. Unlike my Surly road bike, a machine that chews up hills for breakfast, my city-bike, with her perky handlebar basket and her ting-ting bell, is a thing of beauty and comfort. She is not built for speed. She is more suited for carrying hunks of Gouda and a bouquet of flowers while spinning along Dutch flat roads or wending along the seawall to Granville Island…
So, as everyone flew by me, it triggered a memory of some sage advice, “It is not a race.”
And though I’ve heard that line a thousand times, this time I really heard it. Because here’s the thing about races…they’re all heading for the finish line. And guess what our collective finish line looks like?
That’s right!
Yes indeed, we are all heading for the ultimate finish line of life. So why the hell do we want to get there so fast? Perhaps this is a good time to remember that other old adage, “Take the time to stop and smell the roses.”
Since we are all journeying to a finite end, it might best suit our purposes if we slowed the hell down and lingered, dawdled, meandered, and generally dicked around while taking deep inhalations and sighing exhalations.
In other words…what if we actually paid attention to our lives, said no to what is meaningless and time’s equivalent of rice pilaf, and instead said yes (!) to living and loving and laughing?
Perhaps, just perhaps, it behooves us to quit trying to cram as much as possible into our lives so that we end up remembering nothing at all.
Rushing through life reminds me of those high-speed trains where the scenery has been reduced to a senseless blur. Slowing down is more like a lovely saunter down a beach where every shell, every sparkle, every moment, is a chance to stop and take in the beauty.
Stop. Look. Listen.
Live. Love. Laugh.
It is NOT a race. This is your day to shine. Please take it.
I am always so inspired by your words, Colleen. You have this unique way of taking a message so “duh-uh,” like “stop and smell the roses, people!” and turning it on its head. Thank you for the reminder that it’s time to slow down. To breathe. To laugh. To love. To soak in the sun. To smell the flowers. I’m so sorry for your friend, but so glad she has you.
Enjoy your day, my friend. I will be enjoying mine. 🙂
Bless you Gwen. I really write these things as my own reminders. I swear I need what my mother used to call, ‘a stiff talking to…”
I give myself these messages and feel that by making them public declarations, I’ll have a better chance of actually hearing (and hopefully remembering!) my epiphanies.
How much I agree with you! You should take time to “swallow and masticate” every moment, and live your life as if it was your last day.
“It is better to travel than to arrive” – say a Chinese proverb.
Hi Catherine, I like the idea of chewing on the day…like a dog with a chew toy 🙂
Last night I watched (for the second time) the lovely Indian film called, Lunchbox. A saying comes up in that film something along the lines that the ‘wrong train can still get you to the right station’.
I like that idea. Don’t worry so much about the path but pay attention and enjoy the ride and realize you’ll get where you need to go. Ultimately we will get what life needs us to learn and often it is not what you would choose but it will always be something you can work with (at least, that’s what I keep telling myself!).
Your words about slowing down are so fitting, especially at this time of year…autumn, when we take stock of the past summer with all of its projects and running about…It’s Harvest Time…for gardens, friends, mushrooms, wild berries, all preserved in one way or another, to be enjoyed during those long dark days of winter, here, north of the 60th parallel…Wishing you peace and strength to carry you through the coming season.
Thanks for your beautiful words Sophie.
It truly is harvest time. The leaves are turning, the nights are cooler and it’s getting to be time to hunker in for the long dark days ahead.
Thank you especially for the wishes for peace and strength; those are the two things I feel I need in spades right now.
Such a timely post to welcome me back from Haida Gwaii timelessness to the hurlyburly of even Sunshine Coast living. Being in a place where the rhythms of the seasons are so visible and synced with human activities – hunting & gathering, putting up preserves, mushrooming, fishing, getting everything ready for the long dark winter – freed me up to slow down enough to dispense with time almost entirely.
Sure I may have posted some photos, but other than that, my phone and watch were dead to me and we lost ourselves in hours of North Beach walks, beachcombing, talking with local artisans and residents about the cycles of communal living in such a remote place, and generally being in the moment.
My heart aches for you and your friend… my time with my own dearest friend, a longtime worker in Hospice has taught me how incredibly valuable it is to just have friends and family BE with you on that journey. I know she loves and appreciates you tremendously because you will stay with her and be fully present.
Know the rest of us love you and support you and through you support your friend – we’re all holding you up and we’ll give you a metaphysical push up that hill on your ‘girlie’ bike.
Bless you Laurie. It is indeed the company we keep along this journey that makes it all worthwhile.
I’m so glad you had a chance to slow down and feel the seasonal shift in your time up north (Haida Gwaii is high on my list of places to visit and I’m happy to hear it lives up to the other stories I’ve heard about it).
I feel so blessed to feel your love and support and the metaphysical push up this next long hill.
My goal is to just be, to be with whatever is. It’s feeling like a big assignment but I’m so grateful that it’s a shared one.
Thanks…
True words. That’s a natural in Puerto where the midday heat makes everything and everyone move so languorously you can’t help but stop and take in your surroundings. Today I was chugging slowly up a hill ( I’m betting you know the one I mean) past a pile of dirt and cement and swore I could small jasmine. Sure enough a little bush growing in a crack of soil was there, covered with stars of sweet blossoms, so I did in fact stop and take in the fragrance. A good excuse too to catch my breath.
Michele! I do know that exact hill! And I certainly know how that heat slowed me down too.
I love this picture of you breathing in jasmine stars…so perfect. The hot air would deliver that scent so powerfully.
Please enjoy a mango juice with me in mind. I have such good memories of my visits to Puerto Escondido. I am definitely coming back soon.
It’s like you have been watching me lately – NOT A RACE! Thanks for the reminder.
My heart leapt at my understanding – she wants time to live, love laugh….oh you already used those words! But they created an “Ah Ha!” moment for me.
Now, to get to the heart of my Life – Living the life my heart is waiting for. You are my guru!
Ah Karen, I am the most unlikely guru you’ll ever meet. Trust me on that one!
But I’m so glad that this post helped to create an ‘ah-ha’ moment.
It certainly felt like it clicked into place for me today. I feel more and more outside of the streaming busy-ness that everyone seems so intent on proclaiming to themselves and to the world. Glad to have a kindred spirit along for the ride. Take good care and stay true to your heart.