“The more I see, the less I know for sure.” – John Lennon
Every month Oprah seems to know something for sure.
I, on the other hand, seem to be rapidly running out of certainties. What I do know for sure is that life is meaningless; a pointless crapshoot of life or death, health or sickness, happiness or mental illness, yin or yang.
This truth seems most self-evident in India. Everything and anything is completely in your face. Any country that has oft-posted signs that read, Expect the Unexpected, knows this to be true. Gaunt cows shuffle through the floating plastic, sharing the road with the limos and the feral dogs. There are broken beggars and women of bedazzling beauty, piles of jewel-coloured fruit buzzing with flies, children with missing limbs and glowing smiles; impossible and unbearable crazy contrasts, almost too horrible to take in as one thought…and yet.
And yet.
The only meaning that can be ascribed to this beautiful and devastating chaos is the one we bring to it.
It is not for me to tell you the meaning of your world, nor for you to tell me what will make mine worthwhile. What we do with our one perfect and precious life is our choice.
Everything is fleeting and more beautiful because of it. What happens to the dance when it’s done? The music once it’s been heard? The kiss when it’s over? The story once it’s read? The walk once we’ve arrived? All of it is gone…almost as soon as it started. Does it have any less worth because of this? Less meaning?
Whose life is more important? The rich man with political power or the illiterate child shivering on the sidewalk?
What counts?
There is a strange and wonderful crazy profundity to our world. We get glimpses of this when a baby reaches up to stroke his mother’s cheek or when the night sky spins with endless diamond constellations.
We all matter and somehow we have to hold life’s insane dichotomy within us; knowing that everything is meaningless and simultaneously fraught with deep meaning.
Life’s a bugger that way.
It’s so funny because this morning I was thinking about what I wanted to write next on my blog. Oprah’s “What I know for sure” popped into my head – it must be an end of the year thing – and what I was thinking is that everything I think I know… life turns around and shows me the opposite.
So, I love this post. And I get it!
Ain’t it the truth Angie?!!
Just when I think I might ‘get’ it…BAM…I’m heading to the wrong conclusion yet again. The dear Dalai Lama knows the enviable trick is to stay as present as possible so we can experience the truth of this particular moment without bringing all our old experiences to bear upon it.
Henri Matisse said, “Nothing is more difficult for a true painter than to paint a rose, since before he can do so, he has first to forget all the roses that were ever painted.”
OhhhhhColleen! Wow…what a post! totally moved me to gratefulness, joy… and to tears! Then I read Heidi’s comment and your reply to her and it all moved me to put on an Enya album (loud!) and dance my way thru our open-plan home. No, I am not a professional dancer…. I just love to move/dance and do so pretty much on a daily basis.( when nobody is home except moi! ) As I danced I simply gave thanks…for you, your gift with words, for writing your blog, for Heidi’s love of snowflakes and for the fact that we don’t have to earn our right to be here….we have already arrived…we have nothing to prove and we are already enough! Now back to the dance floor!
You really tackle the big topics, Colleen! and the end of another year–with so much changed and so much unchanged–is the time of year we tend to think of these. Great post.
Hey Lesley – I like to operate under the old go big or go home game plan. I had google translate that into Latin. It sounds pretty cool (if it’s correct:) Vado Magnus o Vado Domus. Perhaps some bumper stickers are in order?!
Colleen, your words move me to tears, and they confirm my conviction that I will no longer allow others to tell me that I’m “doing it wrong” when it comes to the way I live my life – the things from which I take joy and in which I see beauty.
My dull little life may be meaningless to the majority of the population, tough titties to them.
(The snowflakes are making me a bit dizzy, btw)
Heidi
Oh Heidi. And now your words made me shiver and it’s warm in our apartment!
I am so happy that you recognize that there is no ‘right’ way to live. It took me years to realize that I didn’t have to earn my right to be here and I’m so happy you know it too.
How outsiders view our lives has no relevance.
Enjoy your snowflakes. Your life doesn’t sound dull at all. It sounds magical.
I love to agree that life is meaningless. But I am sorry to disagree how you can see this in India.Have you ever really really travelled to India ? Just like Oprah,you too stays there as a person who jump into conclusions on what you really ‘love’ to perceive ? Realization is completely different from selective presumptions.Go on..
Hi MeetIndianSpice. Thanks for your feedback. I agree. I think all our perceptions/presumptions are selective and subjective. It is impossible for any of us to be truly objective.
What I meant by using India as an example was how the dichotomy of life is even more obvious.
Ultimately, I am arguing against myself because I believe life is profound and very meaningful but it is up to us to provide the meaning with our beliefs and perceptions, whatever those might be.
It was in India that I had some of the best conversations of my life on this topic 🙂