“I once was lost, but now am found…” – excerpt from Amazing Grace
Yesterday I was lost…
I felt pushed down by a heavy deep sinking, a weight that pressed upon me; like the barometric registration of the flattened skies before thunder and lightning cracks it all open.
I attributed my inability to focus on anything as a result of our epic non-stop downsizing last week. (When the fractal lightning of the aura migraine hit later that afternoon, I understood what my slowed and unfocused body was all about. I wonder when I’m going to start to remember this connection??)
But at that point I was still clueless as to why I felt lost – and so – when I looked at all the packing I needed to do, I did what any reasonable person would do.
I got on my bike.
I decided my cycling expedition was research (we move to our new one-bedroom (office-less) apartment next week and I have been randomly searching for a new place to call my ‘office’). I had been hearing about the Lost & Found Cafe and decided it was time to check it out. Cycling down Carrall, then onto Hastings Street, past so many of my broken fellow beings, reminded me to be grateful for all I had. With every push of the pedals, I felt like I was pushing away some of my thunderous tiredness.
At 33 West Hastings, I locked up my bike, ordered an iced coffee and settled in to watch.
The cafe was large, the walls plastered with huge black & white photos of people and places from around the globe. There were old suitcases topped with globes, groups of people working on projects and a retro world map that reminded me of my elementary school days.
There was a lovely quiet buzz, not the loud clatter of self-important too-loud discussions like some coffee shops where everyone seems to be competing to see who can talk the loudest on their phones.
Others, like me, were alone with their laptops and tablets.
As I was leaving, I asked the woman silhouetted in the window if I could take her photo.
And so I got to meet Kristen. She has a fabulous blog called The Endless Meal.
I smiled as I unlocked my bike to go home…a small connection, a good cafe (and possible new office) and a slight lifting of my personal weather.
Today I am left with only a residual migraine hangover. A few laps in the pool, meditation and perhaps packing a few boxes(!) will help.
Weather comes. Weather goes.
Sometimes my only job is to hang on.
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