“The ideals which have lighted my way,

and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully,

have been Kindness, Beauty, and Truth”

–Albert Einstein

When we downsized, one of my biggest issues was letting go of boxes and boxes of books.

Out of all the stuff that we had to get rid of to make the big (or should I say super-small?) move, it felt like the books were the things that were the hardest to let go.

But something shifted during that process. Now, though I still love buying paper books, and though I still manage to find room to keep some of those, mostly I love to give them away.  I give them to flight attendants or tuck them in waiting rooms or hand them to a friend and with great pleasure, say, You don’t have to return this, keep it or pass it on… I also like donating them to the Little Libraries that are dotted around the city, and in between I make almost weekly runs to the library for stacks of other books that live for three weeks at a time on the windowsill in the living room.

Which brings me to a rather strange book that has somehow managed to remain on our shelves. It was printed in 1986, written by Alexandra Stoddard and has a very tall-order kind of title. It’s called, Living a Beautiful Life – 500 Ways to Add Elegance, Order, Beauty and Joy to Every Day of Your Life.

I think Ms. Stoddard was my first introduction to the Martha Stewartization of life, although Stoddard never made me feel like I needed a team of servants to pull it all off. Instead, her book was about finding ways to introduce beauty into life, to add simple grace notes to life. She seemed to embody elegant living and somehow helped me understand that kindness and beauty were intertwined.

Admittedly, it sometimes seemed the woman had a lot of time; I never did get a ‘small collection of different coloured inks and sealing wax’ for the handwritten notes that she recommended I send.

But she did inspire me to send cards and notes more often than not and I adapted my own version of thoughtfulness by sending links or clippings of anything that I think would be of particular interest to a friend.

Most importantly she encouraged the addition of beauty into everyday life; beautiful bedding, a nice teapot, a perfect cup, nicely plated meals, ambient music, cloth napkins, all the kind of details that good hotels, restaurants and inns use to great effect.

Of course, I adapted my Mennonite version of her suggestions. I knew we didn’t have to have expensive bouquets. Instead, a shining glass vase holding several tall budding twigs can add the promise of spring to a room.  And a lit candle always adds a hopeful glowing beauty to any room. An urn with bath salts and a shiny scoop promises restoration and incense reminds me of Indian temples.

Her writing encouraged me to have ‘rituals of quiet and calm’ and to have, “…a time set apart each day, when you can unwind, be in touch with and restore yourself…”

Recently I pulled her book out again and realized how much of what I absorbed in all those readings has become part of how I live my life; the bed made, the sink clean, the pillows fluffed, little moments of beauty and order that feel like a kindness to myself and to anyone entering the calm, clean space of our little home.

These grace notes feel like safe stepping stones that help me navigate across this crazy river called life. And God knows, right now I am in need of any solid footing I can find.

Beauty, grace, kindness…how do you incorporate this particular trinity into your life?