I fear I am not the sharpest pencil in the box when it comes to the workings of computers and all the technological advances that face me each day.
Yesterday I spent a mind-numbing number of hours using most of the expletives I know, and inventing a few new hyphenated versions, that are probably right now still chilling the air over the sofa back in Sechelt.
I am in Vancouver now and happy to put some physical distance between me and yesterday evening’s debacle, but clearly it’s only geographical distance because – yessir! – the problem remains…though now I’m refusing to engage.
I shall be calm and Zen-like instead. See? See how calm I am??
It started, as so many of my plans do, with the best and truest of intentions. If I purchased the Scrivener writing program, it would practically write The-Thing-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named. It would sort and tab and chapter and scene and sticky-note and corkboard me into a writing machine.
It worked for a little while. But then I left it alone while we were in France.
Yesterday, when I wanted to put something into a chapter category, it made it a sub-directory of the previous chunk of writing and for awhile it disappeared altogether. I tried the forums, the chats, the help line, the knowledge base (seriously, it’s called the knowledge base!) For the life of me there was no one in the world with my problem, because quite clearly everyone else in the world knows what they’re doing.
This did not change the fact that I could not find pages and pages of very hard-won writing.
Then, as if I’d clicked my heels together, it reappeared. I swear I saw a puff of dark-blue smoke immediately afterward. It was like bad magic. Bad juju. Bad. Bad. Bad.
I had my words back but I could still not categorize them the way I want to. Nope.
Shit Happens. I know this is pretty mild stuff compared to the bigger problems one could have.
I GET that. I truly do.
I’m really trying to see the sunny side and to make lemonade out of this thing, or at the very least, a Lemon Drop.
But right now it seems like a better idea might be to skip the lemony-twist and just hit the vodka.
I’ll try to be mature, and just in case I am, here’s a recipe for a fabulous summer drink. A word of caution: Do not operate heavy machinery or the Scrivener program whilst imbibing.
Lemon Drop
2 oz vodka citron
1 oz lemon juice
1 tsp simple syrup
sugar
lemon twist
Instructions:
Moisten the rim of a martini glass with a little lemon juice and dip in sugar to frost.
Mix vodka and lemon juice and sugar syrup in a shaker with ice.
Shake well and strain into a martini glass. Garnish with a thick zest curl.
Way to recover on that computer meltdown. Yes, I too know of what you speaketh, and I do like the lemon drop approach to calming oneself. And the picture of lemons is stunning.
Thanks for the photo comment. I took that picture in Palm Springs. Lovely lemons in those palm-tree type locations 🙂
I ended up having this amazing champagne/gin/lemon cocktail at the Tourism Victoria event yesterday. So now I still get to look forward to a Lemon Drop and we all know that Kevin Redl makes the most amazing Lemon Drops on the planet. Hopefully he’s reading these comments.
oh honey, i feel for you. that lemon drop sounds like just the medicine.
Hey Barb. I think it’s the kind of thing that requires sharing. Perhaps we could toast to my Scrivener program and to your renovation?
I’m thinking the Lemon Drop would be just the thing to fortify one’s self with in order to be able to command the Scrivener program!
Mandy, trust me when I tell you the Lemon Drop can drop kick the best of ’em. One is great. Two always seems like such a good idea, but really isn’t!
Hey Colleen, The lemon drink looks fabulous for a sunny summer day! Thanks for sharing. When I get frustrated or complain about something, David, my oldest son, looks at me and says “first world problem” and walks away. Not very helpful but does give some perspective.
AnneLise, I’d suggest that you’ve raised a very world-aware son. Good job there! Though, like you say, it doesn’t leave much room for a good ol’ rant when you want to whinge a little.
And yes, I highly recommend the Lemon Drop. It is truly first-class medicine and just sour and sweet enough to make you lick the entire glass 🙂